Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
