fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
