I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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