it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
He's on the porch naked. Help.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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