Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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