Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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