The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
Randomize
