I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
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