If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
4 words: hood of his car
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
