I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
