she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize