think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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