I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Last time i carry you out of a forest
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize