toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Randomize
