Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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