Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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