I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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