After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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