i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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