Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
