he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
