I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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