bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
What a dumb baby whore.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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