he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize