guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Randomize