Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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