That's intense
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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