After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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