Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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