I CAN MOONWALK!
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
