you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I am available for nakedness
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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