I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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