i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
