I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
