What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
