Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
