just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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