he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
