Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
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