my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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