Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
