This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
