In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize