therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize
