birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
