Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
