I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I don't think brook has ever known best
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
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