Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Randomize
