Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
this is an emotional support booty call
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize