at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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