Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.

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(805): View more from California

I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?

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(646): View more from New York

Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(631): View more from New York

I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks

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(765): View more from Indiana

let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...

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(914): View more from New York

Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought

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(240): View more from Maryland

I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.

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